Go Kale, Not Jail

We should all eat kale. Not only because its got a name which makes it sound like a cool hipster girl but also because it's freaking awesome. I bought a big bunch from the farmers market not too long ago and steamed the life out of it. After eating it, I was on a health high for like a week. The NY Times writes that kale "has been found to have the greatest antioxidant capacity of all fruits and vegetables. It's an excellent source of vitamins K, A and C, as well as manganese, and a very good source of dietary fiber, calcium, iron and potassium. All of this nutritional value comes in a low-calorie package."

Can't you feel your immune system and your longevity gene getting an erection just reading that? I think it's time for some Kale pizza!

Who is Policing Rev. Jerold Lindner?

Read this story about accused pedophile priest Rev. Jerold Lindner and tell me you don't find it extraordinary.

To be clear, I'm not talking about the accusation that the Rev. Jerold Lindner sexually abused nearly a dozen people, including his own sister and nieces and nephews, nor the fact that one of his alleged victims beat him up. Pedophile priests are a dime-a-dozen, unfortunately. And incidents of revenge beatings of pedophile priest, while less common, are not unexpected.

This, on the other hand, is quite extraordinary:

Larry Lindler, a retired Los Angeles police officer, said he last saw his brother more than two decades ago after he walked in on him molesting his 8-year-old daughter during a visit. The two were playing a game called "blankie" in which Lindner asked the little girl to lie over his lap like a blanket and then wiggled around as if trying to get comfortable.

"The last contact I had with him personally was the day after I caught him with my daughter and I told him he best get in his vehicle and leave," he recalled. "I said, 'If I go out to the truck and get my off-duty weapon out of the glove box, you're a dead man."

A police officer, of all people, catches his brother molesting his daughter and he does nothing about it? He doesn't, at the very least, report him? It's hard to be judgmental of the parent of an abused child. At the same time, as a police officer, it's hard to believe Mr. Lindler didn't realize that sweeping his brother's pedophilia under the rug will allow Rev. Jerold Lindner to go on molesting little kids and, in the process, destroy countless lives without, as it turns out, any accountability whatsoever.

When Vegan Bimbos Attack

Apparently vegans don't really care about what they put inside their bodies as long as it's vegan. True? As true as Britney Spears proclaimed virginity until her marriage.

I was walking around Notting Hill today and I went inside this shop with a colorful sign proclaiming "Vegan Healthy Food". They had loads of scrumptious stuff like "Vegan Vanilla Brownies" and "Sugarfree Raspberry and Almond Tart". I was like: Yay! Cruel-free and white powder-free treats! A must try!

But I couldn't and I'll tell you why. I asked several staff members what the ingredients were in their sugarfree tarts and non of them knew. The only thing they would repeat to me like parrots with dead eyes was: "It's vegan."

Uhm. Ok. So because it's vegan I'm suppose to ignore whatever else they have used in their tart in order to substitute the sugar in it and just go for it? Don't think so. I asked another staff member and she shrugged her shoulders right before saying: "I don't know what's in it. Maybe like flour, jam, margarine..."

I felt like hugging out of her. Margarine? Really? First of all, far from all margarines are free from animal fats and secondly it is a highly processed food and usually contains emulsifiers, preservatives, additives, artificial colourings and flavourings.

This is what pisses me off. Just because something is vegan, people assume it's healthy. No it's not; sugar, alcohol and cocaine could tell you that.

Secondly, and this is to all the vegans out there filling their bodies with chemicals substitutes: What is the point trying to save the animals when you can't even save yourself? If you are one of those who uses lab-produced substitutes for eggs, milk and cheese, I say you might as well eat the real deal. You're not doing anyone a favor by buying fake synthetic food and putting unnatural stuff inside yourself. You're just contributing to the fake food factories and the abolition of real natural foods.

So, next time anyone tells you that something is vegan and expect you to be all naïve and credulous - just say no.


It's Good to Be the Prosecutor, But Quite an Ordeal to Be a 4-Year-Old Kid

Two interesting local legal cases that caught my attention.

In the first case, see if you can guess what the punishment will be for a guilty party in a trial.

Here's the background. A woman accused of trying to hire a hitman to kill her husband goes on trial. On the second day of the trial the judge has to declare a mistrial because (emphasis mine):

At the beginning of the trial, the parties presented a Stipulation to the Court admitting into evidence a tape recording of a conversation between the Defendant and her daughter, and agreeing that the contents were authentic. At the conclusion of the District Attorney’s second witness, the People asked to play the tape to the Jury pursuant to the Stipulation. Mr. Carmen, Atty for defendant, objected saying that he did not stipulate the tape into evidence, he only stipulated to the authenticity of the recording if it was admitted into evidence. Based on the language in the Stipulation, the Court granted the District Attorney’s application to play the tape. The tape was then played to the Jury. After the luncheon recess, Mr. Carman moved for a mistrial based on the playing of the tape to the Jury. He indicated that over the lunch hour he realized that the draft of the Stipulation which the District Attorney presented to him, and which he agreed to, was different than the final Stipulation that the Assistant District Attorney presented to him to sign. Mr. Carman produced to the Court a copy of the draft of the Stipulation that the District Attorney had presented to him. The Court reviewed the draft of the Stipulation. The draft of the Stipulation did not contain language that the tape was being stipulated into evidence, it only stipulated that the tape would be marked for Identification purposes, and that the contents of the tape were authentic-supporting Mr. Carman’s argument about the intent of the Stipulation. Upon questioning, on the record, the Assistant District Attorney agreed that the draft of the Stipulation, which Mr. Carman had agreed to, had different language than the final Stipulation. The Assistant District Attorney admitted that Mr. Carman had not been advised of the change in the language before it was presented to him in Court to sign. Based on the fact that the District Attorney’s Office changed the language in the Stipulation after Mr. Carman had agreed to it, and that the contents of the tape could be viewed as prejudicial to the defendant, and would not have been admitted into evidence without the Stipulation, the Court, based on the Law, had no choice but to grant a mistrial. Jury selection is to begin again Monday, November 1, 2010, in Judge Carter’s courtroom.

My guess is that the Assistant District Attorney (ADA) doesn't suffer any legal repercussions for his/her behavior. Of course, it's quite possible that the ADA's, um how shall we put this, darling trick isn't even illegal. Either way, it's good to be the prosecutor, no?

In the second case, see if you can figure out how a 4-year-old can be found guilty of negligence.

In this case, a judge has ruled that a young girl accused of running down an elderly woman while racing a bicycle with training wheels on a Manhattan sidewalk two years ago can be sued for negligence. My question is, how exactly do you explain to a 4 yo the concept of a jury trial, testimony, etc, so that the kid understands what is going on? Is such a thing even possible? Maybe the ADA from the first case can be used to explain the difference between reality and fantasy to the little kid.

Shamefully Wasteful

To The People In Latin America

In Stockholm and London where I divide my time living, organic and real food is the way to go. Where I usually shop and eat, people care about where their food has come from, how it's been produced, what it contains etc.

However, as soon as I go to Latin America, the story changes. Here, I am the weird Gringa girl who prefers to drink water instead of coke and who get's laughed at by my peers for browsing the supermarket for shelves looking for some non white bread.

In Chile, you are a campesina, an ignorant peasant from the village if you don't drink Coca Cola and eat donuts imported from the U.S. People think you're crazy if you turn down an American cookie in exchange for an apple from the backyard. Frankly, when I go there, people get so confused over why I tend to eat like I was a "poor village girl", though I'm a "rich" (no I'm not) big city girl.

Synthetic American food in Latin America has reached the status symbol it had 50 years ago in Europe: It's cool, its modern and people in Hollywood movies eat it! The thing is that we in Europe have now discovered what this pop culture food has done to us:, we are suffering from the consequences of TV dinners and donuts with obesity and diabetes.

We want to go back to basic in Europe, and are now focusing on organic and fresh-produced food whereas Latin America has just started to ignore the fruitful soil and instead are accepting Doritos, Twinkies and soda from its imperialistic neighbor.

This "friendship" comes with a price though: Obesity. Last time I was in Chile I heard the Health Ministration advertising on the radio, begging people to please stop eating cake and start eating salad. No joke. I saw huge and obese people, most of them who actually were poor and from the countryside where they probably had land to grow their own food, but instead had come to the city to work and live off McDonald's.

To all my Latino peeps: It's not too late - you have the most fruitful soil in the world and you are blessed, unlike us in Europe, with a climate which permits you to grow wonderful fruits and vegetables all year around. Don't by that cheap notion of an American dream with pop tarts and fast food - because that dream will actually kill you.

Peanut Butter Bacon Shackburger

Peanut butter and beef burger? The perfect sandwich for the person who can't choose between high cholesterol and obesity.

Breaking The Myths!

Yay. I get happy when me readers sends me links and saves me like...98% of the job. Like today! My friend send me a link on myths about vegetarianism. The myths were faced with some good old real down to earth-answers.

Here are some myths and the sassy truths!

1. Myth #1: You can’t get enough protein eating vegetarian food.

"Nonsense. The standard Western diet contains several times the amount of protein the human body needs, thus those of us who embrace part time vegetarianism and eat two or three veggie meals a week have absolutely nothing to worry about. Vegans have a bit more work to do here to get enough protein, but a diet containing generous servings of whole grains, legumes, and nuts will easily do the trick."

Myth #2: There isn’t enough fat in a vegetarian diet.

"Anyone who’s ever met up with a big tub of delicious guacamole knows that fat is hardly limited to meat-based meals. And the standard Western diet is so fat-laden that we can easily ingest far more fat than we need. The fact that most vegetarian meals contain much less fat than most meat-centered meals is an advantage, not a disadvantage. Veggie cuisine makes eating healthy a lot easier."

Myth #3: Vegetarians are freakish militants intent on banning all meat.

"If you took the time to actually get to know some vegetarians, you’d find the vast majority of them are quite peaceful...most vegetarians quietly go about their business eating a healthy and perfectly satisfying diet, and they are okay with you eating meat if that’s what you choose to do." (Hahaha, they haven't met me yet folks!)

If You Lie Down With Dogs*, You Will Get Up With Fleas*

This is an amusing story. Ohio Rep. Steve Driehaus aligns himself with the likes of the Susan B. Anthony List and its quest to oppress and demean pregnant women. He votes in favor of the new health insurance law that denies pregnant women coverage for a common, safe, and effective medical procedure until and unless they perform a dog-and-pony show for the amusement of the masses.

Then Rep. Driehaus gets up only to find out that the Susan B. Anthony List is suing for the right to put up ads containing false statements about him.

TOLEDO, Ohio – A national anti-abortion group blocked from putting up a billboard against a Democratic anti-abortion congressman from Ohio has asked a federal judge to overturn a state election law standing in its way.

The Susan B. Anthony List, based in Washington, D.C., filed the suit after the Ohio Election Commission ruled in favor of GOP-targeted, first-term Rep. Steve Driehaus. The commission said there was probable cause that the planned billboard includes false statements.

Driehaus was one of several anti-abortion Democrats in Congress whose votes sealed the passage of President Barack Obama's health care law, which abortion opponents argue promotes taxpayer funded abortions. He has been the target of abortion opponents since the vote.

In its lawsuit, filed Monday, the anti-abortion group argues that the Ohio law barring false statements about a candidate's voting record is vague and violates free speech. It also says the law is unconstitutional because it does not require the offended candidates to prove actual malice.

The group's billboard says Driehaus voted for taxpayer-funded abortion by supporting Obama's health care law. Driehaus said that was not true, and filed the complaint with the commission before the billboards were scheduled to go up.

*With apologies to dogs and fleas everywhere.

You Need To Watch This

Click here for the most horrifying video ever. I could not even watch the whole video myself. Every meat eater who does not hunt down their own meat, or does not buy it straight from an open organic farm should watch this. This is what you do. This is what your demand has done to the lives of millions of animals. When you as the consumer buy cheap factory farmed meat, you are causing a demand which forces businesses to produce meat faster and cheaper than it's possible. So if you want to eat corpses that's fine; I'm not the one who is going to end up with bowel cancer, but at least take some responsibility for what you do to the rest of the world.

I know you think that you're shopping list is insignificant on a global scale but honey, when you add up hundreds of millions ignorant consumers thinking the way you do, buying cheap meat from the supermarket and wearing Nike shoes made from a 8 year old Thai girl, trust me - you do become significant.

Click here for the disturbing reality of factory farming.

Veggie VS Meathead

On of my favorite authors, Jonathan Safran Foer, the author of Eating Animals, and chef/vegetarian-hater Anthony Bourdian, had a debate a few weeks ago on why we should, or shouldn't eat meat, on CBC Radio.

Click here for the interesting debate.

How Can You Love an Onslow?

He sings on coach trips!

Bullets Have No Effect On Pregnant Women

The US military should exclusively use pregnant women on the front-lines since, according to Columbus, Ohio prosecutor Ron O'Brien, bullets have no effect on pregnant women.

Mr. O'Brien charged Dominic Holt-Reid, a man who pointed a handgun at his pregnant girlfriend and forced her to drive to a women's clinic, with one count of attempted murder because he tried at gunpoint to force her to have an abortion against her will.

Which brings up the question, what exactly does one have to do to a pregnant woman in Ohio to merit a charge of attempted murder against her, as opposed to part of one of her internal organs?

An Amazing Organic Day

If you ever get a chance to visit an organic farm, do what Nike says and Just do it. I woke up at 6 am this morning and jumped on the train to one of the most beautiful British farms I've ever been to. The farm is completely organic, and I have to say that all the Angus bulls, the chickens, the sheep, the cows and even the spinach leaves were smiling with joy and peacefulness.

This particular organic farm is one of the most environmentally conscious ones in Britain and it was actually such a delightful experience to be with like-minded people who realize the importance of eating organically and what difference it makes to us, the animals and the earth. If you haven't done it yet, do visit an organic farm if you can: It will inspire you on so many levels to eat well and to take care of your body and your environment.

Love yourself. And your heart, your liver, your kidney, your children, your earth and your mind. Peace out.

Is Your Popcorn Not Fatty Enough?

If your popcorn isn't disease-provoking enough, I have a few suggestions that can make your popcorn fattier than the fattiest Disney World tourist:

1. Stop making your own popcorn.

2. Start buying them at the cinema.

3. Use a Flavor Funnel - a device which is "engineered to make the popcorn taste the same throughout the bag" by distributing the butter or the synthetic seasoning more evenly. Yeah.

The following is an authentic extract from the Flavor Funnel's own website. I have highlighted the best/most worrying parts:

"We've all had it happen at some point in our lives. It happens to the best of us. It's not your fault and fortunately there is help thanks to Baja Innovations Flavor Funnel. We are of course talking about dry popcorn. There is nothing better than going to see that great new movie release on a Friday night. You order your favorite drink and large tub of popcorn ready to chow down and enjoy the feature film. You drench the top layer of your popcorn in butter and seasoning, you then proceed to shake and shake and shake the bag, losing half your popcorn in the process! You think to yourself - I've really done it this time, my popcorn is soaked. You sit down to enjoy the movie, you then eat the top layer of popcorn and start to notice that buttery goodness is all gone! What happened??? I shook the bag and even lost half my popcorn in the process. Should I run out of the movie and put on more? This is a serious case of dry popcorn."

Yes people. A serious case of dry popcorn. I mean why talk about the fact that a big portion of the world is eating itself to death when we have a serious case of dry popcorn? We should put the freaking UN on this one.

You May Now Put The Onion Ring On Her Finger

Are you thinking about getting married any time soon? Tired of conventional churches, town halls and green backyards? Not really feeling the traditional fancy wedding food and...hmm I don't know, maybe the tasteful ambience of a wedding day?

Yes. Now you can finally get married in the most romantic place in the whole wide world! McDonald locations in Hong Kong will make this wonderful exquisite dream finally come true in January 2011!

Oh, and if you really want to cardiac arrest people...I mean impress people, you can even get the wedding cake made out of hamburgers. Yipee.

A Little Cinema Tip

So I'm going to the cinema tonight. Usually it's a bit boring going to most cinemas, not only because someone with really big hair has the seat in front of me but also because the snack they sell is kind of uneatable. E-numbered sodas, butter popcorn and rainbow-colored candy ain't really my style.

So this is my tip to all ya'll movie lovers who do not wish to put monosodium glutamate or E405 into your body while enjoying a motion picture: Pre-Buy Your Snack People!

I did this today; I went to the organic store and bought dried and toasted coconut pieces and some banana chips! Yay. Movie starts soon so need to run to it now though.


Vampires In Yo Kitchen Fool

The suprising thing with buying organic food when you have been eating supermarket vegetables for a good few years is that I actually sometimes find it shocking seeing how fast real vegetables decompose. I mean I like it, because it makes the veggie feel more alive and I feel like we're both children of mother earth waiting for the circle of life to be completed [.....]. However, it also scares me when I compare it to a store-bought carrot that can just live on like forever in your kitchen. Like a vampire. An evil orange synthetic vampire.

A Happy Meal Makes A Sad Sad Body

On April 26 2010, New Yorker Sally Davies bought a McDonald's happy meal. She left it on her coffee table with nothing covering it at all - for six months. According to Miss Davies, there were "no worms, mold, smell, or visible decomposition of any kind." She documented this by taking a picture of the meal everyday, click here for the video.

Stuff like this scares the shit out of me. Not only because this is gross but also because we humans have yet to discover the cure for HIV and cancer but HEY EVERYBODY McDonald's has come up with some NASA shizz technology that allows a hamburger (meat and bread - food that normally decomposes after a couple of days in the open) to remain solid and intact for six freaking months. Now that is some high-tech futuristic science right there.

The hamburger will probably stay this solid inside your body too, I mean never mind proletarian manners like actually digesting your food, that's just so 1764. It's all about preservation nowadays ya'll! Even if it means bowel cancer and a population with constipation. Go science!!!

Deep Fried Turkey Testicles

They taste like chicken. They are found under the bird's left wing. They cost 5 dollars. Need I say more?

Just click here for some Turkey Testicle Love. I don't know if I should laugh or cry listening to those people? They make testicle chewing sound as natural as brushing your teeth. Especially the woman that loudly proclaims: "I need me some testicles!"

The Grand Return of the McRib

Breaking news people! The McRib Sandwich will be available in U.S outlets by the McDonalds Corp. from November 2nd for the first time in over 16 years according to the Chicago Tribune. Loads of people are now celebrating, waiting for this "boneless pork pattie" to enter civilized society again, such as the members of the Facebook group called "Bring back the McRib, please".

According to the article in the Chicago Tribune, the meat in the sandwich is described as "mystery meat" and considered as "pork waste" by some.
Yay. I can't wait.


Yesterday, walking around London I stumbled across a Planet Organic. I went, picked up some lunch and went ahead to UCL to do some...[sigh] studying.

And then I had a food orgasm. Like majorly. The delicious spinach and tofu pancake with the tofu cheesecake as dessert was just...perfect.

The whole UCL library probably heard me moan but it was so good. I wish I had one of those cheesecakes right now *Homer Simpson drool*.

I know, I know. Tofu Cheesecake? That does not even sound right to me, but to my tasting buds...omg..it was SO RIGHT. Believe me, it was right. So if you're ever around a Planet Organic or a Whole Foods, make sure that you try the Tofu Cheesecake from Laura's Idea.

It's probably better than the rabbit. Tihi.

Organic Thug Luv

As we all know, I am way into organic stuff. Nowadays with my job at the organic store, with the organic market on Saturdays right next to me and Whole Foods just 15 min away, I have the fortune to eat around 80% organic. Yay.

Last night when I was eating my organic apple, a little insect came crawling out of it. My initial reaction was to throw the apple away and cry with disgust over this little alien invading my apple and ruining 'Apple Sunday'.
But my next reaction was: "Wait a minute. If this little 8 legged munchkin can live inside this apple happily, it must mean that this apple is completely untouched and pure and like...spiritual or something.

So what did I do? I ate the poor bastard and the apple.

Kiddddding. I set him free. Into a napkin.

All Fish & Chips Lovers Are Gonna Shit Their Pants.

It's a celebration today if you're into fried fish corpses and cancer provoking potato!
All ya'll know how difficult it can be putting salt and vinegar on your fish and chips; things can get soggy, things can get messy, and sometimes not so tasty.

But do not panic! An American company called J&D have invented the Malt Salt. So for "about £2.80 for a union flag decorated pot, it is made by blending sea salt and malt vinegar and, the blurb claims, stops your fish and chips getting as "cold and soggy as a Seattle winter"." [The Guardian]

Marvelous! Oh, and if you're in a shopping mood why not also get J&D's specialty: The Bacon Salt. Because, according to J&D, "Everything should taste like Bacon".

Of course it should.


Yesterday I met a girl who had just bought some pigeon fillets. I almost puked in my mouth talking to her. I mean pigeon. Really? I mean if you're in to flying rats fair enough, but to actually eat some fried pigeon on toast? Barf.

The Health Insurance Law Regulations: Mandatory for Thee, But Not So Much For Corporations

If you are a corporation and you notify the government that you won't be able to comply with this or that key provision of the new health insurance law, there's nothing to worry about. The administration has indicated it's willing to be, wink, wink, nudge, nudge, flexible in applying the regulation.

It will be interesting to see if the government will be equally accommodating when it comes to non-corporations, aka regular people, and that little bit of regulation that mandates you purchase health insurance.


My dear friend Robbie just sent me this! Yes, people: It's chicken. Enjoy your nugget.

Chicken cream on a cone anyone?

Skinny Swedes and Big Mexicans

As I have reported before on this awesome blog, Mexico is the second fattest country in the world, trying to be like its bullying big bro America. I was reading a very interesting article on Medical News Today which offered one possible theory of why Mexico, which historically never has suffered from anything like this, is now facing an epidemic of obesity.

The article not only offers the obvious explanation that Mexico is the U.S's next door neighbor and therefore very easily influenced, but also the fact that "during the 1990s Mexico joined NAFTA (North American Free Trade Agreement) and acquired US business practices, and perhaps also other behaviors, such as driving everywhere, living on TV dinners, and embracing fast food outlets."

Yes people. You know the famous fast food chain Taco Bell? If you think that it was founded by a happy Mexican family with Chihuahuas and Frida Kahlo paintings in their living room, think again. Taco Bell was founded by Glen Bell, a former U.S Marine soldier. Yes I know: Mexican people getting fat on fake Mexican food created by the Americans. The irony is not lost here.

The article on Medical News Today also states that Sweden is one of the slimmest countries in the world. Now, I'm not going to say this is due to the Swedish Ultra Healthy Diet (only click on the link if you're a Swede) because being Anorexic in Sweden is kind of like...okay. It's like having blond highlights in your hair. People will see, people will confirm, people will accept.

I don't know. Being a Swedish Latina makes me want to eat a vegan wholewheat taco and be creepily unpredictable. Just saying.

Saf Me Up

I just have to tell ya'll that I had some crackers with cheese the other day. Sounds unlike me? GOT YA.

The crackers were Saf's raw food crackers which means that they had been dehydrated in one of those food dehydrators and were all raaaaw, seasoned with herbs, spices and vegetables. The cheeses were made of cashew nuts with some sun-dried tomatoes, olives and herbs.

My palette had a silent orgasm while I was eating them. Yumm-ie.

This is a food dehydrator. Most girls just want some diamonds, shoes or a sugar daddy. I want one of these.

In this country we speak American! With some fries on the side.

Remember how I wrote about Jamie Oliver's failed attempt to teach some American's to eat more healthily with less...lard and sugar (...) in his show called Food Revolution? Well now we know why Jamie Oliver's little plan of making Americans in Virginia healthy and happy and like not dead went down the drain. Apparently, "Americans don’t want to hear someone with a foreign accent tell them what to do."

Ohh...so that's why the U.S defied the UN a couple of years and killed loads of Iraqi people? NOW I understand! Thanks Morgan Spurlock!