30,000 Calorie Christmas Dinner

Now you might think that this title is related to a festive christmas dinner of a family of 20.

Uhm, think again. Donna Simpson, a mother and a world record holder of being the heaviest woman to give birth, ate or "inhaled" as this article puts it, a staggering: two 25-pound turkeys, two maple-glazed hams, 15 pounds of potatoes, a 10-pounds roast, five pounds of mashed, five loaves of bread, 5 pounds of herb stuffing, three liters of gravy, three liters of cranberry dressing and a mouth dropping 20 pounds of vegetables and a "salad" made of marshmallow, cream cheese, whipped cream and cookies.

Why did she do all this you might ask? Well, duhh, isn't it obvious? Mrs. Simpson wants to be the "fattest woman in the world". Isn't that every little girls dream?

No Way?

The Dotmenu Web sites have listed this years most ordered food online around America. Below is a sample of the most popular food orders in different cities.
New York, NY: Domino’s Pizza, Cheese Pizza

Philadelphia, PA: Insomnia Cookies, Cookies

Washington, DC: Wingos, Buffalo Wings/10 piece order

Columbus, OH: Gumby's Pizza, Original Pokey Stix

And this is why America is one of the most healthiest nations on earth.

Screw this, I'm going to Brussels.

I feel like an 80 year old woman getting excited over this but hear me out! I was just walking through the kitchen when I stepped on something. I look down under my foot and pick up this weird little hardened green leaf. It was an old leaf from a Brussels Sprout, all hard and crispy. As I put it into the trash can, an idea slowly takes place inside my head: Brussels Sprout Chips (chips = crisps for you Brits!). What an amazing idea! Obviously I googled this immediately and whatdayaknow folks, I'm not the first one to think of this. In fact, I'm probably the last one. On earth. Gosh, I'm so stupid. Either, way, I'm gonna do them tonight if I get hungry. Right now my belly is full of sourdough bread and carrot juice. Don't these chips look divine and oh so healthy?

Palin VS Obama

Merry Christmas folks! I hope you've enjoyed your christmas dinners and that you've spent time with family and your loved ones, because that is what Christmas is all about (yes, I have watched Love Actually one too many times.)

Anyway, I'm back from my little Christmas break to inform you that the intellectual Sarah Palin, while being filmed for her reality TV-show called Jersey Shore, I mean Sarah Palin's Alaska, criticised America's first lady, Michelle Obama by saying "Where are the s'mores ingredients? This is in honor of Michelle Obama, who said the other day we should not have dessert." (referring to Michelle Obama's goal to combat child obesity).

Oh, Sarah, Sarah, Sarah. Nevermind the fact that 1 in 3 American kids is overweight and that the kids in the US today are suffering from diabetes and other obesity related diseases. I mean how dare that lady comment on good old American desserts!? How dares she!?

During a Radio Show last week, great thinker Palin complained: "Instead of a government thinking that they need to take over and make decisions for us according to some politician or politician's wife priorities, just leave us alone, get off our back."

Yeah Michelle! Stop telling fat kids who are drowning in their own tissue that they can't have any more cheesecake or that they should try and move instead of playing video games! How dare you advice us to not eat too many fried chicken legs and start using our own ones to walk? You're killing democracy Michelle, you really are.

And, to finish off this post I would like to quote the scholarly Sarah Palin: "I can see Russia from my house".

I think we all can, Sarah. I think we all can.

Sarah Palin Michelle Obama

Tree Threat Against Jewish City

Photo by andydr

NAZARETH ILLIT, Israel (AFP) – The mayor of a Jewish suburb of Nazareth sparked outrage on Wednesday after refusing to allow Christmas trees to be placed in town squares, calling them provocative.

Predominantly Jewish Nazareth Illit, or Upper Nazareth, is adjacent to Nazareth, where Jesus is said to have spent much of his life. It has a sizable Arab Christian minority, as does mostly Muslim Nazareth itself.

"The request of the Arabs to put Christmas trees in the squares in the Arab quarter of Nazareth Illit is provocative," Mayor Shimon Gapso told AFP.

"Nazareth Illit is a Jewish city and it will not happen -- not this year and not next year, so long as I am a mayor," he said of the northern Israeli town.

"Nazareth is right next door and they can do what they want there," he said.

"Blogger gets 33 months for threatening Chicago [Ob/Gyns] on Internet"

A former Internet radio talk show host and blogger was sentenced to 33 months in federal prison on Tuesday for inviting readers of his blog to assassinate three [Ob/Gyns].


[The blogger] had faced up to six years in prison. His trial was moved from Chicago to Brooklyn, where the case twice ended in mistrials after jurors deadlocked. In addition to his statements [that the Ob/Gyns deserve to be killed, the blogger] posted photographs, phone numbers, work addresses, and room numbers for the three [Ob/Gyns].

“The [medical] system simply could not function if an individual’s efforts to intimidate a [physician] through threats of violence were protected from prosecution and punishment,” Patrick Fitzgerald, the US attorney in Chicago, said in a statement.

“We live in a system where [physicians] should be able to do their jobs and not have to look over their shoulders,” he added.

It's good to be a judge, no?

CIA (et al.) Plan to Destroy WikiLeaks Revealed!

No matter what you think about the competence of our intelligence services, you have to admit that their plan to destroy WikiLeaks is brilliant:

Step 1: Force Assange to have unprotected intercourse.

Step 2: Mind-control him into refusing to take an STI test.

Step 3: Profit! WikiLeaks destroyed!

Cheap Foie Gras?

A French fast food chain called 'Quick' is lauching their elusive new dish: a cheap fois gras burger. Now, Foie Gras is not cheap. Even I as a vegan know that duck livers are expensive. So, when you put something like this out on the market which comes with beef, lettuce and some onions for 5 euros I tend to go "hmmm" and scratch my little head. How can it be so cheap I wonder?
Well...it's not that physical evolution in ducks just totally freaked out and started creating super ducks with giant livers. No. These ducks are being force-fed with corn. This is so absuive it's beyond words. Now, Santa, all I want for christmas is to force feed the consumer of this cheap Foie Gras Burger with...cheap corn. Thank you.

Merry Xmas & RIP Duckies.

Justice, Georgia and Long Island Edition

In Georgia, how much time do you get to spend in jail if you assault a soldier while yelling racial slurs? A little over a month, apparently.

Troy Dale West, a southwest Georgia body shop owner, was sentenced in October to six months in jail for assaulting a female Army Reservist at a restaurant:

West faced a potential 10 years in prison after being charged with beating and kicking Tashawnea Hill as she walked out of the Clayton County restaurant on Sept. 9, 2009. Hill's 7-year-old daughter watched as West assaulted her mother while yelling racial slurs, police said. West, of Poulan, testified that Hill initiated the fight by spitting on him, which she denied.

After serving 1-1/2 months West is now a free man:

[Worth County Sheriff Freddie] Tompkins said West accepted work detail each day he was incarcerated. "It's normal procedure," the sheriff told the AJC. "We treated him the same as we would anyone serving for a misdemeanor."

And the cherry on top of the cake:

During his trial Clayton County assistant district attorney Jason Green asked West, "Is it acceptable to hit a woman?"

He replied, "It depends."

Because the problem with West's behavior is that he hit a woman, not that he assaulted a *person*.

And in an effort not to be outdone by miscarriages of justice in other parts of the country, prosecutors on Long Island distinguish themselves:

A Queens businesswoman has been to hell and back and it all started when she accused a former boyfriend of rape and, prosecutors say, he framed her for armed robbery.

Seemona Sumasar, 35, spent nearly seven months in jail for a crime she never committed, the Nassau County district attorney now admits.

"As much as I knew I was 100% innocent, I didn't know if I would see the light of day again," she said.

Sumasar was sprung last week, and yesterday, her conniving ex, Jerry Ramrattan, was charged as the mastermind of a stunning scheme. He was desperate to get her to drop the sex attack charges she filed in September 2009 after the two split up, officials said. So he paid two pals to concoct the armed robbery lies, authorities say.

Sumasar said cops thought she was crazy when she proclaimed her innocence and recounted the months of hell the spurned Ramrattan put her through.

"They acted like I'm just trying to blame somebody else for something I did," Sumasar told reporters. "They did not want to look at it at all."


"This was a brazen attempt to undermine the fair administration of justice," said Queens Assistant District Attorney Frank Di Gaetano. Queens Supreme Court Justice Richard Buchter described Sumasar's saga as "very startling."

Sumasar and her lawyer call it all a miscarriage of justice.

They complain that investigators refused to check out her alibi that she was at a Connecticut casino when one of the armed robberies supposedly happened

It's good to be the prosecutor, state or federal.

Dangerous Articles

So MSN's Style section posted an article about unhealthy food that is actually not that unhealthy. I know.

Apparently a full English breakfast is not that bad at all! According to the article:

"While conventional thinking suggests a fry-up would be the unhealthiest breakfast option, research suggests that it could in fact be the best way to start the day. A University of Alabama study found that a breakfast of bacon and eggs, though high in fat, appears to programme the metabolism for the rest of the day."

Uhm. I think cocaine does the same. So the BEST WAY is probably to start your day with a lil white line ey? What really worries me is that people reading stuff like this take this "info" [read lies] into account and are actually sickening themselves.

People, people. Don't be stupid. If its fried, made out of flesh, and bathing in oil and grease it aint right.